What I Have To Do
by sccolifar
Summary: The scene where Cammie is on rooftop in GG4. Cammie is contemplating what she is about to do and has a little help from Zach. Similar to book scene but a bit different. Zammie. Warning GG4 spoilers. Three shot
1. Rooftop

**This is my first fanfic, i hope you like it**

**Ally Carter owns all characters and part of the plot**

I knew what I had to do; I'd been contemplating it for ages now. I don't want to do it but I know I have too, it's the only way.

I was standing on the roof of the Gallagher Academy staring out at the small town of Roseville, thinking how much easier it would be to have a normal life, not having to spend every day worrying about dying or other people dying because of you, like Mr. Solomon, right this very moment he is lying down in a hospital bed within these very walls, in a coma, dying, because of me. Everybody tells me I have to have hope, that he's gonna come through and be okay, but I'm no longer a naive little kid, I know his chances are slim. That's how I've come to the decision to leave; I can't keep endangering other people's lives just to save my own. Even if it means leaving the sisterhood, leaving my Mum, Bex, Liz, Macey no doubt they'll kill me if they ever find me and what about Zach?

That small thought made its way into my head without my permission. It's been on the outskirts of my brain ever since I met him back in the exchange programme. But since he came to stay at Gallagher it's been applying pressure. I've tried but I can't deny my feelings for him. I know I love him, even though his mum wants me dead, even though he keeps disappearing on me, even though he won't tell me things I still have these feelings, it's crazy. When I think about, I've known Zach for the past two years, we've shared secrets and stolen kisses or those rare meaningful moments when he looks at me like I'm the most important thing in the world, I still know nothing about him, but at the same time I know everything, the passion in the way he fights, his constant need to protect me, the way he looks when he's in pain or when he's sad, angry, happy or even when he realises his world's about to come crashing down around him. They way his lips feel on mine, or how his body tenses at the mention of his past or his parents, the way he smirks, or how he has the power to melt my insides with one look.

This is why I have to leave, if I don't more people are going to die, more will have to suffer, at least if I'm on my own I only have to worry about myself. So I'm going to leave Gallagher Academy, stop the people trying to kill me, find out what happened to my dad and if I survive this I'm going to come home. I don't know what happens after that I don't know what the future holds, once I thought I did, I thought that I had my life sorted out since I was 13 years old. I was gonna graduate, become a spy, save the world and all that, but nothings ever that simple there's always twists and turns, complications. The smallest things are there to tear us down but we have to stay strong.

I looked out across the landscape one last time saying goodbye knowing that this will probably be the last time I'll see it, I was so caught up in my own thoughts I didn't realise I was crying or that I was being watched.

**REVIEW, reviews and constructive criticism are really appreciated, I promise Zach will be introduced into the story **


	2. Take Me With You

**Hey, sorry I haven't updated in ages. i know i said this would be a two-shot but I've decided to make it a three-shot. I promise I won't change it again.**

**I hope it was worth the wait :D**

As the tears streamed down my face he took a step towards me, he was so close now, I could feel the heat radiating off his body and the warmth of his breath steadily breathing down on me. 'Zach…." That was all it took, with a state of urgency he bent his head down and his lips crashed onto mine, I tried to resist at first but then I remembered that this was Zach the boy, no man I loved. I wrapped my arms around his neck and threaded my fingers through his hair I kissed him back with all that was in me, as if my life depended on it. He was all that existed, the world outside shut down we were in our own little bubble we kissed for what seemed like hours but in reality was only minutes, I know it's bad for a spy to lose all sense of the outside world but this was Zach.

We broke apart from each other breathing heavily as I brought my hands down to rest on his chest and his hands came from around my waist to rest on my hips with a feather light touch. I stared into his emerald green eyes that sparkled with "Cammie? Say something please" he interrupted my train of thought with a plead. He wore a look of pure sincerity and …..Love? No it couldn't be. I brought his head back down to my level as I went up onto my tiptoes and it started all over again. "Zach, we can't do this, not now" I reasoned. "I know" agreed Zach, regret thick in his voice. I tentatively stepped out of his embrace without breaking eye contact. At last I turned away, I felt weak in my knees and had to hold onto the wall surrounding the roof for support. Suddenly I heard lathered breathing right next to my ear "Cammie" my name brought me back from my reverie "Zach, I'm scared. I don't know what's going to happen, Mr Solomon nearly died so did you, and to make it worse the mother of the…." I abruptly stopped, could I really tell him, "the mother of the man I love is the one who's leading them, and I trust this guy even though I shouldn't" with that I turned around and found myself staring into the beautiful green eyes of Zachary Goode. "Cammie I can't help who my parents are and there's so many things I wish I could change, but I can't, Cammie I've fallen in love with you and sometimes I wish I never had because of the guilt I feel every time I see you, or every time you smile it lights up the whole room and I think what would my life be like without it? It would be cold and I would have this feeling in my gut like a knife has been plunged in and then twisted furthering the pain, I can't live without you Cammie, that's why I left Blackthorne and followed you around I had to make sure you were safe, and I am so very sorry for the both of us that I didn't tell you that I love you sooner, because it's true, I love you Cammie with all my heart and if anything was to happen to you I don't how I would cope, it would be"

"Shhh, sh, sh I soothed him, don't think like that, I'm strong Zach, I will survive this. We will survive this, together. I can't promise you much but I can promise you that"

I smiled up at him through the tears surprised to see that I wasn't the only one. Zach's eyes were welling up with unspoken fears. I took in his face burning it into my memory knowing that this would be the last time I would see him for a very long time, maybe ever. Finally I looked back up to his eyes to find that he was doing the exact same thing to me. As our eyes clashed he pulled me into a bone crushing hug like he would never let go, as our bodies collided I buried my face into his chest as he buried his in my hair and took in my scent. "Take me with you" my hair muffling his words

"What"? I asked making sure I heard him right.

"Take me with you Cammie; I can't bear to be apart from you not knowing whether you're in a COC base being tortured or staying in a rundown motel or even worse, dead". He finished in a rush I almost didn't catch it but of course I did, I'm a spy. I pulled back slightly so I could see his face, I reached my hand up to cup his face "Zach you know you can't come with me, I would do anything to make sure I was never apart from you except this, it's too dangerous. I have to do this alone, I can't bring anyone else into this, I know that Bex, Liz and Macey will probably hate me and my mum, I'm all she has left after my dad went missing, but the Circle is after me, no one else so I'll make sure they only chase me. I love you Zach and I will be back". I didn't have the energy anymore to get myself worked up. "If you come back with so much as a scratch I'll have to show you a thing or too I learnt in assassin training". I smiled at his attempt at humour to lighten up the mood "I'll be back soon" and with that promise I showed him just how much I loved him and how much I meant my promise. We broke apart not saying anything. I turned my back on him and walked away letting the tears fall freely.

**What did ya think? Hope you liked it. Reviews are greatly appreciated even if it's just constructive criticism or like 1 word I'll still love them. The more reviews I get the faster I'll update, I've already written half of the next chapter :D**


	3. Silent Goodbye

**Hey guys so here it is my final chapter, sorry i haven't updated in ages, anyways hope you enjoy**

**Z POV**

It had been three days since I spoke to Cammie last, three days since I told her I loved her, three days since I had lost her.

During those three days I had been planning my trip, I would follow her again, but I have to be better she saw straight through me last time in Boston. I can't let that happen again. During my musings I had come and sat in the trees by the Gallagher Lake as a cover from the Gallagher girls. I only had eyes for one Gallagher girl, my Gallagher girl and now she was leaving, playing right into my mother's hands but she's smart she'll get through this, she promised me. One morning I was wandering the grounds of the academy when I saw her. She was emerging out of a tunnel behind a boulder in the middles of woods. Cammie was wearing black skinny jeans, a red singlet covered by a black leather jacket with matching boots and she was carrying a small gym bag over her shoulder.

She crept through the woods treading lightly and staying out of sight from the cameras until she reached the tall gates surrounding the Gallagher Academy. That was why I was so surprised when she just walked right through the fence. On closer inspection I realised that mirrors had been set up to make an illusion of a fence wrapping round the whole grounds, it must have been the academy's emergency escape route. Of course Cammie would know about it, what doesn't she know, a lot my self-conscience answered but I pushed that voice away. By now Cammie had nearly breached the rest of the surrounding wood and I had followed her she was about to step onto the footpath when she turned around I stepped behind a tree in fear of her seeing me. Glancing back up at the academy, her home which reached high above the tree tops I saw a single glistening tear stream down her face. I wanted more than anything to run up to her, wrap my arms around her and fold her small frame in my arms then murmur sweet words of comfort and love and tell her that it would be oaky, but I knew I couldn't. I saw Cammie's lips move in a silent goodbye. She turned back around, as I saw her face for one last time the wind wrapped around me and I let the wind carry my last goodbye 'Goodbye Gallagher Girl, we'll be together again soon" I watched her go, even as she disappeared over the horizon I stayed where I was my feet rooted to the ground.

Hours had passed till I moved from my spot. The beeping of my watch brought me back to reality which meant it was time. I took in my surroundings once again it was nightfall now, with one last look at the point where Cammie had vanished I took off in search of my Gallagher girl. It was now or never.

**So guys there it was the end, i hope you enjoyed it, please review cause they make me so happy :D**


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